What did the farmer that lost his tractor say? Wheres my tractor?

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Nah Nero, nothing wrong here, I mean I am down to earth, you made me realize that, and sincerely you are my best friend, I mean I hang out with geeks all day, and yeah I might be a bit nerdy or even geeky myself, but not like this, I want to be more like you, spend time with you, not playing dungeon and dragons telling myself I am some warrior princess... I thought playing that crap was gonna get funnier but thats not true the least. What I am trying to say is that I look up to you, what you achieved, and still do, while if you look at me, I am literally several grades below you, so yeah, you are looking down at me. And yeah, I might be falling in love with you to be honest, but I know you have a wife and I am the jealous insecure kind, so I would not want to share you with anyone in fear of losing you if you where my husband, but I dont love you for what I want you to be, I love you for who you are. And yeah I know it must be awkward hearing me type my heart out here, but if you want to know me for who I truly am, as sincere as you are, you deserve it. And no, you are not blunt, you are what people would call "honest to a fault", and I adore that side of you, I mean if I want to hear what people think they want me to hear, I ask anyone else, but you, you are different, you are honest to death, and that makes me feel safe and trust you when you say things, I mean you are a free spirit, if you thought I was ugly you would have told me, and that would have been okay, if it where you actually. So I am sorry if I sound weird or desperate or something, its just whats inside of me right now.

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antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

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Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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Get up Look in the mirror

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

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What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

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What dosent kill you only makes you injured

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What's yellow and shouldnt be in this country. The asian girl in my economics class

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A girl asks a guy are you finish. The guy says no I'm British.

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why did the clown fall of the swing? he got shot in the head

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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Why can't vampires go out in the sun? Becuase they don't exist.

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

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your life

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

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What do you call a man who beats his adopted, black children? A terrible person.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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