What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

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What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? -You can research and find several similarities and differences, but I will not go into detail about them.

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Q: What does a Jedi say when another Jedi farts? A: Who sabered the cheese?

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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Your adopted.....

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Why did the girl buy the watermelon? To eat it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

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knock knock who's ther? chris chris who? JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR AND CHECK IT OUT

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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Alright alright Tifa, you look totally different from your drawn identical twin. And yeah I could have been a bit more subtle, don't you worry, I have a special knack for SPAMMING COMMENTS INTO THE ABYSS! I mean sheesh you where pretty open about it earlier, and you said you did not give a damn about what random people thought... Moral: But yeah, I can do better than that, I just do not want to, no seriously, if you are going to go feeling ashamed, then I have failed you.

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops