Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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A man and his dog walk into the park, the man grabs a ball and chucks it for the dog. The dog can not chase after the ball because he has no legs and bites his owners leg.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Mike Mike who? Mike who you just called and told to come over Oh ok, come in

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Why can't february march Because april may

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Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

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knock knock whose there? my penis.

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What does a camel wear at war? Camelflage

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Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

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my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

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What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? I eat pizza.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

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Why did the mother get upset with her son? Because he sexually experimented with his cousin.

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How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

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So does Blake

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

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Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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