What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

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Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

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What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

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What happens when you yank on someones nuts? They cry

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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Hum... I am actually a redhead... Which is so strange saying to anyone including myself, I dye it like constantly.

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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A black guy and a white guy are in a fight, who wins The white guy because they were in a fight over when the black guy was going to die.

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An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

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teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Q: What did the architect say after he tripped? A: My mother died of cancer when I was 6.

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

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One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

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What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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