A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what do you call a woman that didnt make you a sandwich? An ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Adele walks into a bar. The barman says she's too ugly hahahahahahahahahahhahahahha lololololololololololololol

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Thats a real shame. How come your eyes are red to begin with? You can use hypnosis to change the color, but if you never learned how, I am not gonna teach you.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

There was a hundred dollar note lying flat on the ground. The homeless guy didn't pick it up and walked on because he didn't see it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Women. One of the genders a human can be.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q. What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? A. Get in the car Robin.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Colon Right Parentheses For all of the confused people out there that's :)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q - Why did the baby spit out his dummy? A - Because i stabbed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why was the monster truck late to the rally.. because it had no driver

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

69

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why'd my house get destroyed I was afraid the tornado that hit mass was going to destroy it so I blew it up

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you kill a fish? You bite off its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

You know what they say about big shoes? Big socks. You know what they say about big socks? Big feet. You know what they say about big feet? Big hands. You know what they say about big hands? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I went to the principle's office because I had a hard time reading They tried to tell me I was lesdistic

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops