Why did the teenage girl pee on a stick? She and her boyfriend had foolishly engaged in unprotected sex two weeks before, and she was now concerned that she may be pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q:So there's a black guy and a mexican sitting in a car...who's driving? A: The Cop

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do u get Hitler out of a car? You open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man with Alztheimers walks into a bar. He forgets the purpose of being there.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why'd my house get destroyed I was afraid the tornado that hit mass was going to destroy it so I blew it up

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

One night, a heartbroken magician named Jeff went to a bar. Jeff met a nice girl, and they talked and laughed together for hours. After a while, Jeff asked her, "do you want to see a magic trick?" She ate his wiener.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

John: Knock Knock! Bill: Who's there John: John Bill: Oh hey John, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what's the difference between a pogo stick and a traffic cone? well for starters, traffic a cones main function is to cordon off areas or alert drivers to certain areas of road that are not to be breached and pogo sticks are used as toys to heighten bouncing. I'll stop here but the list goes on.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Have you seen Elton johns pet dog? Neither he's he.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops