Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

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What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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roses are red violets are blue, every 1 looks at you and call u a fool

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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A man is flailing his arms in the ocean. Help me, I'm drowning!, he screams. Some dude runs into the water, drags the man out, and is proclaimed a Hero.

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Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

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why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

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100 chefs walk into a bar

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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Why couldn't little Jimmy see his mum in the crowd? Because he was blind.

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"We wear pink on Wednesdays"" -Mean Girls, 2004

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD.

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What do you get if you cross a egg and toast? Egg n soldiers.

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010010101210001010 You dirty girl

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Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

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Doctor, doctor, I think I've got a problem! Correct, you have got acute cancer, you have 2 months to live.

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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Knock Knock. Did someone outside the front door just say "Knock Knock"?

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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