Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

What does Santa Claus keep in his gardening shed? Nothing. Santa Claus isn't real.

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

Q: What's so special about my Ferrari? A: It was painted with babies

Person 1: 'Ask me if I'm a tree' Person 2: 'Are you a tree?' Person 1: 'No.'

What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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