Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

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Q: What did the German say to the Jew? A: Guten Tag.

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EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

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"knock knock" "whos there" "poop" "poop who" "poop in the toilet"

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Omg you bought a Prius? Children in Africa are starving and could have used that money to buy food.

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what's worse than the holocaust the man who thought of it

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Why do many men find it difficult to make eye contact? Debilitating autism.

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A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

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Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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Q-whats worse than getting shot. A-getting shot twice

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why didn't the boy get any presents for his birthday? because when his dad went to the store to get him some presents he ended up buying presents for himself like a huge douchebag.... and the apple doesn't fall from the tree so his son is a douchebag too and doesn't deserve presents.

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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