What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? because 7 brutally beat and raped 9

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Transgenders! More than meets the eye! Transgenders! Girl was once a guy! LGBTs wage the battle to destroy The homophobic forces of Christianity! Transgenders! Homos in disguise!

Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

Why did billy fall down the stairs? He got pushed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...