A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

What's the difference between Jordan and Time? Time passes!!

An american took a vacation to Mexico.... the American police were contacted 3 days later... the American was supposedly killed during a drug trade...

how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

Testicles.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

Whats worse than 1 bee sting... 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings... The hollacaust Whats worse than the hollacaust... 3 BEE STINGS!!!

A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

i want to meet Dora's parents and ask them why they let that bitch go everywhere

How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

What do you call Eric Torres A furnace magnet

Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

a black and a mexican are walking down the street, two cops look up to see this and immediately say "shit, this can't be good".

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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