Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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How to make Ramen like a boss Step 1: get a promotion

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Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

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What happens when you spend far too much money in a gambling machine during a solar eclipse on a leap year? You get poor.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? -Because all races like fried chicken.

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What's the difference between an orange? A bycicle you fool, a vest doens't have sleeves

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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What did the black guy, the Mexican guy, and the Chinese guy have for lunch? A sandwich

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Q: What does a gay horse eat? A: Cheese

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

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When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u sat something about an owl I'll kick u in the face u fat cike

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Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side of his body? He has been taken to hospital and is in a critical state where his right side of his body can not be joined together. This is life threatning and he is now not able to walk

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why was the little girl happy? because she found an icecream cone

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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Why is six scared of seven? Because seven is in his house with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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