I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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When's the best time to kill a black man? Never. Committing murder is a felony and constitutes as highly immoral.

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Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

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Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing you sicko, it was a tragic day for the world.

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A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

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Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop.

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

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Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more likely you are to realize that beans aren't actually fruit. They're legumes.

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Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

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Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

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Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

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What do you call 200 black people dead in the ocean? It's a start.

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Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

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Yo mama looks so much like a cardboard box, my kindergarten class graduated.

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how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops