Steven Hawkin ran a marathon.

A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

whats black and red all over? a chalk board

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

What's white and capable of flash photography? A pony, I lied about the photography.

I had a really great joke to tell you!

Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

Why did i write this joke? Because i'm a try hard.

Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

person: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? person: A Hipster. Me: False.

What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

There are two muffins sitting in an oven, one muffin says to the other; boy it's hot in here. the other other muffin doesn't reply because it's a muffin, muffins don't talk. Now consider that the first muffin was a squirrel, A TALKING SQUIRREL!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well you shouldn't be. I came to tell you your family died in a car crash and you have AIDS.

What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

What time does lunch usually begin on the other side of the world. Noon.

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

What's big and white?

Hey do you want to hear the joke about my d**k?? I cant tell it because it's to long

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...