How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Why did the doctor commit suicide? His wife was recently killed in a car accident and simply could not take the emotional pain!

Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

You may notice something very odd about this paragraph. There is something strange although you can't figure it out. It is boggling your mind and keeping it from thinking of the real purpose of this paragraph. It is like an enigma in an enigma in an enigma in an enigma. Stop thinking hard and think inside Da Box. I just wasted your valuable time although it's not really valuable if your looking at this website.

The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

Why did the dog eat poop?

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

Women's rights

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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