It's only racist if you consider them people.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

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A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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"knock knock" "Come in"

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Q.Why was the man so fat A. because he had to much to eat

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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Once upon a time, there was a horse that had no legs, it laid on the ground it's entire life and died. The end.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder and help him down

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Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

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A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

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violets are blue, my name is Dave. this poem makes no sense. microwave.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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What did the boy find on his laptop? -Nothing, he comes from a broken home and can't afford one.

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Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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