Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

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A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

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Roses are red, Violets are red, you are a liar, oh wait you're not!! MY BACKYARD'S ON FIRE

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

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Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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How do you make a 6-year-old cry again? Tell him that without further change to the system, he'll end up paying $100,000 for school and then not have a job when he graduates.

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How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

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I was gonna make a joke about a my dick... Racecar

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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a irish man walks past a bar

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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whats black? the colour

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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1 black man on the moon = problem 10 black people on the moon = problems Whole black population on the moon = problem solved

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Hi! This is Ms.McGruder you two boys in my office at 3:00 p.m. today

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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