Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

what do you get when you use heroin aids.

how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

- What is worse than a baby in a trash bin ? - A baby in five trash bins.

What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

A blonde walks into a drycleaning store 2 pick up her clothes and as she walks out the empoyee says cum again and the blonde says shut up it was toothpast this time!!!!

Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

What's the warmest organ in a dead baby's body? My penis

When is a door not a door? Never.

why did the mokey fall out of the tree because it was dead.

Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

What did the trucker say when his hat blew out the window? "**** my hat!" What did the teenager say when the same thing happened to him in his small car? The same thing, except he was a teenager, driving a small car.

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

Q: What did the duck say to the other duck? A: Quack

How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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