What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

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Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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how do you complete an exam. dont be kaizen.

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facebook is like a refrigerator. you eat it.

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How do you survive a tornado? You dont.

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Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

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a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why is this site popular? Because people don't read the terms of service.

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:O <===============3 :===========3 :======3 :===3 :3 It all makes sense now.

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Q what's worse than Tori's singing A absolutely nothing !

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a doctor came into the room after receiving a woman's test results for lung cancer. the woman says, "is it negative or positive doctor?" the doctor looks at the woman and says, "it's negative, congratulations."

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a yacht. Unfortunately the yacht is in a shop and all 3 of them sustain injuries following impact with the concrete floor.

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cats are pussies

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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In Soviet Russia, table flip you! ???? ? /(. - . \?

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i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

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25

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Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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