Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

What did the dog say to the house? Roof

what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because crossing through traffic is very dangerous

A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

once you go black your credit goes wack

I'm so full I could stop eating.

Whats the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? Ghosts aren't dolphins.

Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

Q-whats green and has eyes. A-A frog are you stupid

Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

Women's Rights

Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

What happened to my sunglasses?

Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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