hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

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Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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whats black and blue and white all over A little caucasian boy who is being abused by his parents

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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I have Alzheimer's, i pee out gold, racoons

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To commit suicide thus getting to the other side(hell/heaven)

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What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

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Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

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Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

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roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

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What's the shittiest thing ever ? Poop.

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

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Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops