Why did the boy miss the school bus? He died in his sleep

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What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? One is easier to unload with a pitchfork.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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Jimmy wet his pants in class during geography class. The teacher asked: "Oh Jimmy, why did you do that?" Jimmy answered: "I don't know" Everyone laughed at him and Jimmy went home very sad. And with wet pants.

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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What's worse than a spray tan? - A spray tan of hydrochloric acid.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

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Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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besides saying "Oh, Yeah" and punching down walls, what does the kool-aid man do? drink cool aid

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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There were two planes to take off.. One did, the other not at all..

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What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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What did a dodo do after his last meal? Become extinct

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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You suck big fat slobber

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Whats brown and smells bad poo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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