Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says "Is it hot in here?" The other muffin says "Yes. It feels like 425 degrees."

Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, racist.

what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

Greg and Michal once had a fight I lost.

You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

Bloody kids ...

What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard

What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

I have Alzheimer. What?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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