Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he needed to get to the store across the street.

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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The weels on the bus go...flat

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What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

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A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I like poo F*** on You By drew bolton

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knock knock come in

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what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

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What the corn in the core? The mexican antelope.

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What's harder than a rock? The dead baby in my freezer.

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what did batman say to robin before he got in the batmobile get in the batmobile

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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fatest boner fatest boner fatest boner to adam ramsden

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Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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poo

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Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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What do you call Chuck Norris when there is a bullet inside of him? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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