*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

What did the homeless guy do when he saw a bucket? He peed in it

Wanna hear a joke? My penis size.

Knock, knock. Come in!

What's more annoying than Minion quotes? That the girl in the basement keeps screaming for help.

Blarg

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than that? Dying. What's worse than dying? Finding three worms in your apple.

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

42

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

Barack Obama

You remind me of something. What? Summer Why because I'm hot? no because there is no class..

When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

knock, knock . whos there? the police. get the hell outside !

penis

Gabe Mercado

What do you call the people that ride on the upper level of a double decker bus? Passengers.

why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

It says so on your cap.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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