What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

Banana(s)

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

What is brown and sticky?

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Chapter 6 : The pimp ``scooby`` tells how delivered the poor young people to people with money.

What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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