What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than that? Dying. What's worse than dying? Finding three worms in your apple.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment were left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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I came.

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A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

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If u see a guy with a buzz cut and earrings what would u ask? R u a girl with cancer

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Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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Whats worse than your camera not working? getting hit by a fridge during the Holocaust

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96

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

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What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

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Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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