Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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What is a pirate's favourite letter? There is no definitive answer. It depends on the individual pirate, and the environmental and genetic factors that go to make up his or her preference for a particular letter.

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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sixty....eight.

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Whats the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A refridgerator What's white heavy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A polar bear

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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How many teenagers does it take to change a light? 1. Unless he has some sort of disablity then probably 2.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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69

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

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What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

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why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

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when life gives you 100 reasons to cry, you should cry. you're lucky you haven't killed yourself at this point

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Friend: I said pass the juice, not gas the jews! Hitler: Oh.

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Q: How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She shot herself in the head.

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what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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What's wrong with your hand!!!!!???? nothing.

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Pavel Novak

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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