What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

how many people does it take to take over the world aperently just 1 me

What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

A man walks into a bar, he asks if the bartender knows where Starbucks is. The bartender finds this exceptable and shows him the way.

how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

What happens when there is a jew next to you and you are standing on a train track? A train hits you both and you both die.

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

how do you kill a giraffe? you don't.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: A sad, unfortunate dog.

How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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