how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

What was the weather like at the rap concert?there was a lil wayne.I DID A FUNNY! !!

lipstick pig

Why dont polar bears eat peguins? Because they live on opposite ends of the earth and it would be physically imposible!!

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Mexican and an American are on a plane. It crashes due to an oversight concerning its weight limit, killing all of its passengers.

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

roses are red violets are blue cover me im goin in

roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

What would u like to drink?

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

who likes to gets to get fisted A) sock puppets

Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

What do you call a man with no head? Nothing he has no ears.

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

A man walks into a sofa. BANG

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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