What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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What happens when batman jumps off the top of a building? His fake wings fails and he dies upon impact of the ground.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms

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Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

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Roses are red violets are blue i have HIV you should probably get yourself checked...

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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Why did the boy punch a little kid in the face? Because he was a bully and liked to feel superior.

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What's Big and Round? My Testicular Cancer

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

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Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

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Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

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what happened to the man who got stuck in a car after a crash? the ambulance failed to arrive and he died a slow, trajic death.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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