A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

What is the difference?

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

Why did the police officer arrest Maxwell? Because he's black.

what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

Dylan F fell off a bridge Landed in some water and was ok 2 days later he got bit by a shark He is now in a coma

Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

Did u know that 10/10 people die?

A man walks into bar carrying a nondescript glass bottle of beer. The bartender speaks up in a harsh tone "We don't allow outside drink here buddy! If you're drinking here, you're buying it from here! The man replies, "Oh I'm sorry, it's just that this isn't a normal beer. Every time you take a swig from it, you are granted one wish!" The bartender, who is at this point getting visibly irritated, "I ain't got no time for fairy tales. Screw off!" The man seemingly unfazed by this anger tells him, "I'm not any kind of liar. I have three sips left. You can have them if you want." The bartender snatches the bottle with his unwashed hands from the man. "Fine" he says gruffly "I'll drink your magic beer." He thinks for a brief minute and says to himself, "I wish I had an expensive sports car." and takes a drink from the bottle. No later then a second later, a Ferrari pulls up into the driveway. It is a sleek and dark red color. It was of the latest model and did not have a single scratch whatsoever. The bartender's eyes pop wide open in astonishment and he quickly makes his second wish, "I wish I had a beautiful girlfriend!". And he took another drink. No later than five seconds, A leggy 5'7 blonde bombshell steps out of the entrance. She dons a short white skirt, Long red stiletto heels and a jet black spaghetti strap top. The bartender starts to sweat and looks a little nervous. "And my final wi-EUGHAAAHGGHHH!" The bartender collapses from the floor drooling from the mouth. It turns out that the liquor he was drinking was 180-proof alcohol that his old liver could not take. The blonde woman steps back and lets out a disgusting shriek. "Ewww, this old ugly hobo just ODed on the floor. Can we go somewhere else for drinks Jeremy?" Her boyfriend replies, "Yeah good idea babe. This place looks a trash heap anyway. You deserve better." The couple do not hesitate in stepping into their sleek red Ferrari and driving off. The man who had given the bartender the beer proceeded to check the dead man's pockets and rob it of all of it's contents. Nobody ever caught the man, and not a single person in the bar cared enough about the bartender to call 911. Moral of the story: Magic does not exist and life sucks.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A: A quadriplegic.

Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

Fine Nero, but I will be keeping an eye on you.

It's so hot even chuck noris can't withstand this shit.

A man walked into his house to find that his wife was cheating on him with another man. He was furious, and killed himself

Have you ever noticed how those little packets of sweetner are really handy to have around when you like your coffee to be sweeter than its default bitterness?

There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

a white guy a black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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