A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a WAFFLE!

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Some jokes rhyme, But this one doesn't

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

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why did the guitar player cross the road? to play his gig

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Father Murphy met Samuel Myer on the street. Sam it's been a month o' Sundays since I've seen you. You look propserous. How's the moile business? A snip better, Father, since we talked last. And thank you. For what, Sam? Well the last time we met you asked what I did with the foreskins. Well, here is the answer, my new business. What's this, a wallet. But so smooth, Sam. Yeah, Father, but when you rub it. Rub it, Sam? Yeah when you rub it it falls apart. And you have to buy a new one! Mazel Tov!

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

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Why was six afraid of seven? He was wanted for murder.

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A godless abomination that violates every ethical standard known to man.

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

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The dinosaurs aren't really extinct. Just kidding.

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What happened when the ugly girl asked her crush out on a date? He said yes. He found her personality quite attractive

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A woman wears a dress.

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Who visits Satan on Christmas? A dyslexic box.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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Knock knock. Who's there? ... Damn knick knockers.

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womens rights.

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Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

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how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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