if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

Call of Duty is a good game.

how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

Q. how to kill the germ on a food. A. wash it with bleach.

Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

How does Ron Weasley greet Harry in the morning? Mornin' Horry, how did ghe' sleep?

PIED NINNY!

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

What's the difference between two telephone poles? T-shirts! Because motorcycles don't have doors!

violets are green roses are purple this makes total sense, cheeseburger

Q. What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? A. A bench is an inanimate object used for sitting on while a Mexican is a human being.

If an anti joke is told, and it is about an aunty is it an aunty anti joke? Adolf Hitler.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

How many light bulbs? 1

What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

Q:What the worst lie you have ever told??!!???!?!?!?!? A: I have read and agree to the Terms and Service

what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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