A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

thumb_up thumb_down -139

There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you say when you see a winner weaner

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

thumb_up thumb_down -70

How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +193

So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

thumb_up thumb_down +181

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

thumb_up thumb_down +81

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

thumb_up thumb_down -85

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops