Q. why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton? A. it said concentrate.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Older.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

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A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

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what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

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Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I'm Color Blind F*CK

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

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When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

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What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

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why didn't your dog come home last cause he died

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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How do you know if your teacher is gay? Ask him if he is gay.

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there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One splatters and makes a big red mark on the ground when dropped from a building. The other is a fruit.

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How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

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Wat do u call a priests shit Holy shit

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What do fish and dogs have in common they are both animals

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I love pissing people off :P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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