A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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Cancer

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What did the normal guy say when he went to the Special Olympics? What a bunch of retards.

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What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

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What do you call a dumb blonde with no hair? You don't, since there is no way of knowing that she is blonde.

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There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

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(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

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Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

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Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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Whats the worst way to find out your married. Hungover

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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Whats worse then people People copying other Anti-Jokes. People copying other Anti-Jokes about the holocaust.

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

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Knock knock Who's there? Micheal Jordan. Micheal Jordan who? Your an idiot

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Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

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If Michael Jackson was alive we would who cares he is dead

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why were the girls confused? they were in a logic class and couldn't seem to find the irrationality chapter in the book

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What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

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It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-646-2835 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names travis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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