Why Does God Hate Gays? He Doesent, God Does Not Exist.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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69

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

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What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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Mexicans are like waffles

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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