Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did Swiper steal Dora's stuff? He shot her and then took her backpack.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what's the difference between "rita , sue and bob too ," and rocky II ? rocky II is about boxing

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do Japan and Haiti have in common? They are both islands.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

This would be racist to black people if they could read.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why id the Jew keep putting his name at the end of anti jokes? He was an attention seeking big nosed virgin kunt

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Where's Waldo? It is impractical to search for him because he's just going to get lost on another page once you find him. You assume he was murdered and get on with your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Ask me If I'am a tree are u a tree? no.....

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Where's Waldo? Six feet under.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Badgers are cool

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? There's an alive one at the bottom what's worse than that? He ate his way out what's worse than that? He enjoyed it

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is funny about family guy?the jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops