What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

- What has 2 legs and is bleeding ? - A dog cut in two.

Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

Q Why was the boy sad A he wasnt sad he was dead and therefore had no emotional feelings

my whole life!

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No Neither have I

What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

Q. why are black people so good at sports? A. Hardwork and dedication.

Women's rights.

a black kid goes and gets some cereal and spills some flower on him self and he goes to his grandma and says look grandma i`m white and then she slaps him he goes to his grandpa and says look grandpa i`m white and then he slaps him and then he goes to his mom and then says look mom i`m white and then she slaps him then he goes to his dad and then says dad i`ve been white for 20 minutes and i all ready hate yall nigas

What's big and red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater!

what's difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

What did rosa parks get for christmas? -Racism

What's the difference between Mike Tyson and Anna Nicole Smith? Mike Tyson's not dead.

Roses are red. My name is dave. This poem makes no sense. Microwave.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

Look how far I can kick this bucket

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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