whats worse than school...wait a minute?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than dying? Dying poor.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. Your mom is the punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

guess what no i know what your thinking, its NOT chickenbutt. its that tomorrow i have a math test. that sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did Sally get for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

you are driving down the highway, if two birds make a bee then how many pies can fly at once? None because I can't read

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Whats the different betweene a drugdealer and a cop? I dont know but i think they dont have the same wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

No, luke. I am your father. damnit

thumb_up thumb_down -43

wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

thumb_up thumb_down -43

4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What do you call a black man in a Police car? A Police Officer

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops