If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

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What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you get when you cross Sir Elton John with a sabertooth tiger. I don't know but you better keep it away from your ass.

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Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

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HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

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What do you call a black man at the head of the U.S.? A mistake.

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2 out of 4 questions. How do you get an elephant in a fridge? Open it, take the girrafe out, put the elephant in, and close it.

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Hi

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

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Why did the cow cross the road? He was in the moooooooood.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones Well maybe you shouldn't play in the tree anymore

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Q : whats the most annoying thing on the earth with a big fore head ? A : Paige

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Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

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What looks like a duck, smells like a duck and feels like a duck? A duck.

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An enormous black man wearing a durag walks into a bar. Due to the diverse and friendly comminuty he lives in, nobody judges him on his race, ethnicity, or culture. He goes on to pursue his career in business and gets a Masters Degree in Business Administration. He get's a job as an IT Director for a very successful business and he marries a well educated woman. They have 2 kids, but one of them is diagnosed with "Ondine's Curse" and dies in it's sleep. Distressed, and mourning the death of his newborn son, he seeks help from his parents. Regardless of his parents comforting and loving attitude towards him, he goes into the inner city smoking and selling illegal drugs like crack. He even got into cocaine and marjuana. 4 and a half years later, he was about to attempt suicide, when he saw his only living son, whom he loved with all his heart, walk into the room with his teddybear. He just looked at him, and he looked back. Suddenly, the father started crying. Flashbacks started playing though his mind of his happy life he was steadily pursuing. "why me?" He constantly thought to himself. What did he do to deserve this? 7 years in the future. The father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Right before his death, he asked to talk to his son. "Son, listen to me. Never try to comtemplate the world we live in, it's too spontaneous and insane to understand. This world can either give you bliss or depression. Nothing inbetween. And most people who make there way up to the top eventually will fall. What goes up must come down. Ha... I never thought I'd be talking to me own son giving him a silly lecture in a deathbed. But just look at me..."the father gets very muddled and disoriented* "...Son. They say most of us have a good reason to live. Well don't most of us have a good reason to die too?" Malik Cartwright died on March 22, 1999. His son went on to legally change his middle name to "Leek", after his father's nickname. He went on to get the same Master's Degree that his father received, and had kids of his own. The whereabouts of the mother are unknown.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting Doctor Interru- You have cancer.

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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What's the best joke in the world? This one.

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"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

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Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, get out of the garden it's time for lunch.

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A gay man came out 5 years ago, he also has not heard his farts since... He lost his ears in a boating accident that same year

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How do you get a Black Person out of a tree? Well, if he is stuck call 911 itmediatly!

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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