What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? - Getting killed in the Holocaust. Whats worse than that? - Nothing.

Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

What kind of fire alarm does a zebra not like? One that doesn't work

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

what do mexicans like most. icecubes

Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

What is brown red and white? I don't know, that's why I asked you

Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

Wanna hear an anti-joke?

What's black and flies? Whatever it is, it's not a car.

Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

u know y blondes and tornadoes r so alike? first theres a lot of blowing and sucking, and then u lose ur house!

Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

A woman walks into a bar.

WHAT'S LESS THAN 0? FIONN'S DIGNITY AFTER HENRY'S

knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

oh no, i've lost my tractor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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