Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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Good luck on your finals everyone!

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

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So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

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There is a high speed police pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns to the other and says "Moo".

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

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Why did a Monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

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What is the difference between a blonde and a Mexican? Their hair color.

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Women's rights.

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, "The one whom I kiss is the one you seek. " To which they responded, "Gay. "

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops