why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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Why did the black man buy watermlons? Because a new local super market just opened and they were on sale.

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When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he does it the same way everybody else does.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

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A Cow Walk's Into A Bar And Say's Drink Please The Bartender Is Then Sent To A Mental Hospital For Talking To A Cow.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his coat? Where's my coat.

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Sac

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

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vaginas

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Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

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Whats worse than a Jew Ben rike

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

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What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

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What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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What got stolen from the poor boys house... Nothing, he was so poor that he couldn't even afford any thing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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