How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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kid: can i go to the bathroom? teacher: you have to say the alphabet first. kid: ugh. fine. a.b.c.d.e.f.g.h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.q.r.s.t.u.v.w.x.y.z teacher: what happened to the p? the kid bows his head in shame sits back down as the entire class laughs at him.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a whore.

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love is a homeless guy searchin' for treasure in the middle of the rain and finding a bag of gold coins and slowly finding out they're all filled with chocolate and even though he's heartbroken he can't complain cuz he was hungry in the first place.

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A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun

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This is an anti joke. Please make it the bestest and most well likeded one on this site.

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whats worse than having your sextape leaked to the media? not being a kardashian when it happens.

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Q. How many lemons does one person take to fill a ladder? A. Fish

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What do you call a dolphin on a unicycle? You need medical help

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Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

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Chuck Norris will inevitably pass away sometime in the future.

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A horse walks into a bar... just kidding the doors were to smal.l

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What did my dad say when i knocked over the christmas tree? nothing, my father is dead

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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What did the little boy order at Burger King? He ordered a burger and wiped his booger on the counter.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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What Do You Call Black People Skydiving? A fun time.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Well why don't you open the door and find out!

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there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

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How do you turn a frown upside down? You cannot do such a thing because frowning is the act of sadness. Therefore you cannot nor should not change a persons attitude.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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