How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

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Women's rights.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he needed to get to the store across the street.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

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Q: What happened to the dead baby? A: It was Buried

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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knock knock who's there?

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Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

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What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

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How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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I have a black man in my family tree... He's still hanging there.

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If you stretch all your skin out in a line, you will die of blood loss or possible infection

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What did the house do when it came alive? It went home

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A redhead walks into a hairdressing salon and asks to have her hair dyed black due to being a subject of bullying and social rudeness.

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Jamie stegman is a masive idiot and does not have a life at all he is a tool which is true becuase no one likes him

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What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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