Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

Why doesn't business go well for pizzeria Vesuvio? Their chef has been dead since many years.

What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person who lives inside is depth.

Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

What's worse, a dog dying or cancer? The Holocaust.

What's black and white and red all over? Colors

What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

How do you make a ninja fly a plane? You put a gun to his head and say fly this plane.

Why did the Asian eat rice? Because its food

why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

Land Rovers

Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...