What did the famed say when he lost his tractor I lost my tractor!!!!

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Women.

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

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How do you know if your teacher is gay? Ask him if he is gay.

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

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your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

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What did the dog say to the cat before they fought? Lets fight

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Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

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Spotto

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Why does life suck? Because it does

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a piece of chicken? They were once both alive and innocent. I lied about the black guy.

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Brothers and sisters,I have none. But my sister's daughter is also my daughter...

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who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

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how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops