Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

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I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

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Your Mom.

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What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie

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What's the difference between God and Kanye West? God doesn't think he's Kanye West.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

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Why did Johnny stop walking halfway to school? A fridge fell on him.

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What do you call 5 of my friends and 5 of your friends hanging out together? I don't know. I don't have any friends.

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A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

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a man walks into a bar he got hurt

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

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Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

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Come In!

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Why did the chicken go up the car? To get a drink.

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What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

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What's brown and dirty? Dirt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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